Authority and Compassion in the Summer Retreat

Early in the morning at the temple courtyard, fresh sunlight began to filter through the leaves of ancient trees. Hundreds of children in blue uniforms stood in line waiting for breakfast. The atmosphere was noisy and lively, filled with laughter and calls echoing across the grounds. Amidst this crowd stood a young man of about twenty years old, wearing a red armband that marked him as a Youth Leader. He stood with his arms crossed, his face darkened with anger.

Before him stood a child of about seven years old, eyes wide open, lips pressed tight in fear. The child had just accidentally dropped a bowl of porridge on the ground, splashing it onto their white shirt. The Youth Leader shouted loudly, his voice shrill and harsh.

"What are you doing? Why are you so careless? Clean it up immediately!"

The child flinched, tears welling up in their eyes, trembling and unable to move. This scene caught the attention of Most Venerable Thich Chan Quang, who was observing from a distance. The teacher immediately walked over, and the air suddenly became tense.

The teacher stopped before the Youth Leader, his gaze stern but not angry. He asked quietly, just loud enough for the young man to hear.

"Do you have the right to shout like that?"

The young man stammered, his face turning pale.

"Yes... yes, sir. I only wanted to teach the child to be obedient, so they would learn to keep things clean."

The teacher shook his head, his tone firm yet full of compassion.

"That is not allowed. You only have the right to persuade the children. Do not use authority, do not use harshness. Why? Because you are inadvertently transmitting negativity into the tender soul of this child. Later, when they grow up, they will treat others with the same aggression. Your duty is to teach them to love, so they realize they are loved, and therefore become naturally well-behaved."

The teacher turned to the child, bent down to wipe the porridge stain from their shirt, and spoke gently.

"It is okay, my dear. Be more careful next time. Go wash your hands properly and then eat again."

The child nodded, offering a shy smile before running off. The teacher turned back to look at the Youth Leader and continued to explain.

"Remember this clearly: Only parents have the right to scold their children. Why? Because parents gave birth to them and raised them to adulthood; their gratitude is as vast as the sky and sea. But you? You only meet these children for a few days during the retreat. You did not raise them, nor did you give them life. So what right do you have to assert dominance? That is improper and unauthorized."

The young man lowered his head, clenching his fists tightly, feeling a surge of shame rise within him. The teacher continued, emphasizing the responsibility of protection.

"Moreover, these children are precious gems entrusted to us by their parents. We must protect them day and night. At night, leaders must stay awake to watch over them, guiding them to the restroom and ensuring absolute safety. Do not let any regrettable incidents occur. To do this well, one must undergo thorough training, covering everything from meals and sleep to proper conduct."

In that moment, the Youth Leader understood that leadership is not about domination, but about service and love. Punishment only creates fear, while compassion awakens self-discipline and gratitude.

The Meaning of the Story

This story highlights the principles of conduct in educating and managing children: A guide or leader does not possess the absolute authority of parents, and therefore must not use threats or shouting. Instead, they must use compassion, persuasion, and a high sense of responsibility to protect, care for, and guide the children. This is a lesson in humility, compassion, and professional ethics in social and religious work.

Compiled from the dharma talk of Most Venerable Thich Chan Quang