What You Do Not Want, Do Not Do to Others

On the third day of the Lunar New Year, golden sunlight gently spread across the temple courtyard, and the temple bell echoed softly in the spring breeze. Inside the meditation hall, hundreds of Buddhist practitioners sat in silence, their eyes turned toward the Dharma seat. The teacher sat there, with a kind smile and warm gaze looking over the assembly. He began to speak, his voice deep and soothing, like the sound of a flowing stream.

"Today is the New Year. Dear practitioners from far away have made the journey here to visit the temple and see me. I am deeply moved. My wish is that you will never abandon me, this poor teacher."

Then, he spoke slowly about the theme of the dharma talk: "Kỷ sở bất dục, vật thi ư nhân." He explained: "This means, whatever you do not wish to happen to you, do not do it to others. These are the words of Confucius, and they have served as a moral compass for thousands of years."

He paused, looked around the assembly, and shared: "When someone comes to visit you, and you know they have just traveled for three hours, what is the first thing they need upon entering your home? They might need a seat, a glass of water, or perhaps even the restroom. But if you just grab their hand, pull them to sit down, and talk nonstop without noticing their restlessness—they shift and fidget, you push their shoulder down and continue talking—watch out for the consequences!"

The assembly chuckled softly. The teacher continued: "This happens because we fail to put ourselves in another's situation. We are only aware of ourselves, our own stories, our own preferences."

He then spoke about a police officer: "When pursuing a criminal, a skilled officer does not rely solely on physical clues. They sit quietly, immersing themselves in the criminal's mindset. They imagine themselves as the murderer—where would they run after the crime, who would they seek out? Sometimes, they can guess the exact house, the old friend not seen in ten years. This is putting oneself in another's position, much like sitting in meditation."

The teacher's tone grew more solemn: "But how often do we, in our daily lives, put ourselves in another's position? Probably very rarely. If someone speaks ill of us behind our back, we feel deeply upset. Yet when we speak ill of others, we feel satisfied. If someone scolds us, we are irritated, but when we scold others, we feel pleased. This is the injustice of human nature."

He shared another example: "Some come to the temple on a busy New Year's Day, where few know each other. A newcomer stands there, disoriented, seeing no familiar faces, greeted by no one. We sit there, watching them, silent. But if we were in their place, how much we would long for a simple greeting, an invitation for a cup of water. Yet we do not stand up. This shows we have not yet learned to place ourselves in another's situation."

He paused, then said: "Therefore, from this New Year onward, let us each day practice putting ourselves in another's position just once. This is practice. Practice is not only about kneeling before the Buddha's altar to recite sutras, sitting in meditation, or counting prayer beads. True practice is learning to step into another's mind and circumstances, to understand them and respond appropriately."

He emphasized: "The saints always place themselves in the position of sentient beings, yet their minds never grow weary or agitated, because they abide in meditative concentration. When our mind is settled, we naturally become the other person. For us, making this effort once a day is already a great achievement."

Finally, he spoke of the significance of cause and effect (karmic law): "Whatever you do to others will return to you. If you cause others sorrow and suffering, you will someday receive the same in return. Therefore, have reverence for karmic law; do not inflict pain on anyone, not even animals."

The teacher smiled, his eyes sweeping over the assembly: "I wish all practitioners a New Year of advancing on the spiritual path, doing many good deeds, and always remembering: whatever you do not want, do not do to others."

**Meaning of the Story**

This story teaches us a core moral lesson: to learn to put ourselves in another's position before we speak, act, or treat anyone in any way. Whatever we do not wish for ourselves, we should not inflict upon others—this is the root of ethical conduct, a way to practice daily, and a means to avoid creating negative karmic results for ourselves.

Compiled from a dharma talk by Venerable Thích Chân Quang.