The Third Day of the Lunar New Year: The Secret to Happiness and Loneliness

On the third day of the Lunar New Year, the temple welcomed many Buddhist practitioners returning home. Some arrived at midnight on New Year’s Eve and stayed through the entire holiday. Yet, many families found themselves busy debating whether to visit the paternal or maternal side first. Sometimes, due to distance, they could only choose one location, leading to conflict. Some even chose to remain single to avoid such troubles. But why do we always long to return to our families during the New Year? Reunion holds a sacred meaning that everyone needs to understand.

Why Is the New Year a Sacred Time for Reunion?

The New Year is not merely a holiday; it is a time for family, tradition, and remembrance. It is when everyone desires to gather together. The happiness of reunion is difficult to describe, so those who cannot return home often feel profound sorrow. Remembering the song "Winter Night" by musician Nguyen Van Thuong, written when he lacked money to return home for the holidays, reveals how deeply people yearn for family peace and joy.

The New Year is truly the day of the Vietnamese family. Therefore, everyone returns to gather with one another. This happiness of being together is hard to express in words.

Community Communication – A Vital Need for Human Survival

We cannot live without communication. Communicating with the community develops the brain, shapes character, and creates joy in life. When happy, people invite friends to drink and talk, simply to feel the fullness of companionship. During the New Year, seeing crowds of joyful people on the streets makes us happy too, because this is a natural human instinct.

Communication with the community brings us three things. First, it develops the brain. Second, it shapes our character. And third, it gives us joy in life.

How Do We Communicate?

The issue is not whether we communicate, but how we communicate. When meeting someone, what is the first thought in your mind? What words leave your mouth? What actions do you show? A disciple of the Buddha must practice cultivating a heart of love and respect for every person. This is the fundamental principle of cause and effect (karmic law). If this intention does not arise, meeting others is like not meeting them at all, and we sow seeds of loneliness.

When we meet people in this life, the first intention in our hearts should be a vow to love and respect them.

Our words also need to express care. Instead of asking "Are you well?" as in the past, asking "Was there traffic on your way?" is now a way to show concern for modern struggles. Our actions—shaking hands warmly, offering water, sharing cakes, giving lucky money—are concrete expressions of love.

The Trap of Secret Intentions

Dangerously, many people smile and chat happily on the outside, while secretly cursing, criticizing, or calculating gains and losses inside. No one hears these secret thoughts, but karmic consequences have already formed. Each critical thought is like a hammer blow striking away one's blessings from merit. Gradually, people fall into loneliness, and no one approaches them anymore. Temples where monks and nuns cherish every visitor, rich or poor, are crowded with practitioners. Conversely, temples that are indifferent, viewing the poor as a burden, will become empty.

Each word of criticism is like a hammer strike against one's own blessings from merit.

Be a Temple in Your Soul

Each of us is a child of the Buddha. Wherever there is the Buddha, there is a temple. Thus, our minds are also temples. Just as an abbot must love and treat everyone who enters the temple equally, we should treat those who enter our lives with the same fairness. Whoever comes, whether high or low status, whether seeking help or making offerings, should be respected and loved. This is how we create merit, ensuring a future filled with warm reunions.

Since we are children of the Buddha, the Buddha resides within our minds. Wherever there is the Buddha, there is a temple. Therefore, each of us is also a temple.

This New Year, let your heart truly communicate: with relatives and with everyone, using an open heart. Do not lose your blessings from merit through jealousy, pride, or calculation. Reunion is not just about external circumstances but about sincerity within the mind. Practice daily, hour by hour, so that every encounter is filled with love and respect.