The Stain of the Holy One

This is the story of an old monk who practiced austerity for fifty years in repentance for a past wrongdoing, illustrating a subtle truth of morality: ordinary people forget their faults and remember their merits, while the holy remember their faults and forget their merits.

In the late afternoon at an ancient temple nestled deep in the mountains, pale golden sunlight filtered through the bodhi trees, scattering shimmering spots of light across the brick courtyard. The sound of the bell echoed through the stillness, announcing that the hour of evening chanting had arrived. In a corner of the courtyard, an old monk in a worn brown robe was slowly sweeping up the fallen dry leaves. His thin, trembling hands moved with patience, as if each motion were another washing of the soul.

The young disciples often looked at their teacher with a mixture of admiration and curiosity. They saw him living a life of purity, diligently performing even the humblest tasks without a word of complaint. Whether misunderstood by his fellow monks, or unjustly scolded by his elders, he would simply bow his head in forbearance and smile through it all. For forty, fifty long years, this image was etched deeply into everyone's mind as a symbol of perfected practice.

One day, as his health declined, the old monk sat resting beneath a banyan tree and called a young novice to his side. His eyes were calm and quiet, gazing far toward the horizon where clouds drifted slowly by. The novice asked respectfully:

"Venerable teacher, why is it that your whole life you have endured hardship and been mistreated by others, yet we have never once heard you complain? Do you have some special secret?"

The old monk sighed softly, and his voice, hoarse yet warm, rose in the silent space:

"My child, no one knows the secret of my life. When I entered this temple seeking to practice, it was not because I wanted fame, comfort, or an easy life. It was because I carried a great wound in my heart, a heavy wrongdoing against my own family."

He paused, his eyes brimming with tears, recalling a sorrowful past:

"Long ago, when my mother passed away, my father remarried. Out of selfishness and a lack of magnanimity, I hated my stepmother deeply. I slandered her, wronged her, and even set traps to ensnare her in shameful rumors. My father believed my words and drove her away. In her humiliation and grief, she threw herself into the river. Her death was caused by none other than my own narrow heart."

A gentle wind stirred the leaves resting on the old monk's shoulders. He continued, his voice choking with emotion:

"Only after that tragedy did I awaken. I realized that through my lack of compassion, I had created karma of tremendous evil. I entered the temple not to seek a swift liberation, but to repent. This entire lifetime of practice has been devoted to nothing more than washing away that karmic obstruction. Each time I was scolded, each time I suffered, I reminded myself that this was my way of repaying her, and of answering to my own conscience."

The novice listened, his heart tightening at this story of such deep remorse. The teacher went on to explain the principle of cause and effect (karmic law):

"Ordinary people tend to remember forever the small good deeds they have done, yet easily forget their great faults. The holy ones are the opposite. They remember clearly every mistake, every stain of the past, even after the karmic fruits have been fully repaid. As for me, though I have practiced and attained the way, though I have realized meditative concentration, whenever I recall that former life, the feeling of remorse remains undiminished. That is why I always keep a heart of repentance."

The story closed in profound silence. The old monk rose and returned to his sweeping, each motion seeming to hold an entire lifetime of repentance. The lesson of moral subtlety settled into the hearts of those who heard it, reminding us that true wisdom lies in the ability to recognize and correct even the smallest of our own faults.

The Meaning of the Story

This story illustrates the bodhisattva's practice of "Repenting Karmic Obstructions." Its essential point is the difference between the mind of ordinary beings and the mind of the holy: ordinary people tend to remember their merits and forget their faults, while the holy ones, the bodhisattvas, even after having fully repaid their karmic debts, still remember clearly and feel deep remorse for the stains of their past. This arises from transcendent wisdom, which allows them to see the true nature of karma and the importance of making amends through many times more good deeds than the wrongs they caused. Repentance is not merely the repayment of a debt, but a process of purifying the soul in order to reach perfection in virtue.

Compiled from a dharma talk by the Venerable Thích Chân Quang.