The Vu Lan Season: Those in the Spirit Realm, Those in the Living World — Who Helps Whom?

Have you ever wondered: when we make offerings and pray for the departed, do those in the spirit realm truly receive anything? And how might those who have passed on, in their own way, be able to help us in this life? As the Vu Lan season returns, this question arises once more in the hearts of many children of the Buddha.

Vu Lan – Swimming Against the Current of Instinct to Remember Our Parents

The Vu Lan festival has two main themes: first, remembering our parents, and second, thinking of those who have passed away. Venerable Thích Chân Quang once shared:

"Speaking of filial devotion is a moral matter that goes against the natural instinct of human beings. That is why it is not easy."

Indeed, without moral teachings, people tend to love only their children and forget their parents. The Venerable recounted a moving memory: when he was young, his father pretended to drink wine so that his child could eat all the delicious food, and only after the child finished would he pick up the leftover bones. That is the greatness of a father's love, which we sometimes forget amid the busyness of daily life. The Vu Lan festival is an occasion for us to go against our fickle instincts and awaken a deep sense of filial devotion.

Those in the Spirit Realm, Those in the Living World: Who Helps Whom?

When we pray to our ancestors, we hope those in the spirit realm will help us. When we make offerings of food to wandering spirits, we are helping the departed. So who helps whom? Venerable Chân Quang affirmed:

"Whoever lacks blessings from merit needs the help of one who has them. That is the law. It does not matter whether one is in the spirit realm or the living world. Only those with abundant blessings from merit have the capacity to help those with less."

This is not a matter of the two realms but a matter of virtue. A wealthy living person helps the poor; a departed one who still has blessings from merit may become a guardian deity of the nation. Spirits with little merit become wandering souls, in need of help through offerings of food and the chanting of scriptures. Through this law, the spirit realm and the living world interact with one another in accordance with cause and effect (karmic law).

Each Day, Choose a Joy – The Most Important Way to Accumulate Merit

So how should we live in order to have blessings from merit? The Venerable offers a gentle yet profound suggestion:

"Each day, I choose one joy. Likewise, when we choose the way we find happiness, whether we lose merit or gain blessings from merit depends on how we choose our joys in this life."

Try comparing: is it joy in receiving money, or joy in giving money away? Joy in giving orders, or joy in serving? Joy when others lose to us, or joy when others surpass us? The wise person chooses the second kind of joy. When we learn to find happiness in simplicity and humility, each day we accumulate a little more in blessings from merit.

Joys That Deplete Merit – Be Careful

There is one kind of joy that is very dangerous: feeling glad when we see others fail. Venerable Chân Quang warns:

"Some people feel joy when they see others fail. No one sees this joy, yet it destroys all of one's virtue. We must correct this mind/heart. Whenever we see someone fail, we must sincerely feel their pain."

Moreover, chasing after a lavish lifestyle also depletes one's blessings from merit quickly. Many people, simply because they love luxury, find that when their merit runs out, their business fails and their wealth slips away. Let us learn the lesson of simplicity: finding joy in boiled water spinach and a whole, unpatched shirt — that is the way to preserve our blessings from merit for the long term.

Happiness Is Non-Self (Anatta) – The Destination of Those with Merit

The Venerable teaches that the greatest blessings from merit lie in a mind/heart of non-self (anatta), in the happiness of serving without demanding anything in return:

"Happiness is right here. It is when we have non-self (anatta), no longer seeing ourselves as anything at all. Content to humble ourselves and stay low."

When we know how to be completely obedient and gentle, doing everything with a mind/heart free of discrimination, we attain the virtue of being like a "robot" — the highest expression of letting go of the ego. Such a person has great blessings from merit and can help countless sentient beings in both the spirit realm and the living world.

The Vu Lan season is a season of love and gratitude. Please take time to practice: making offerings, offering food to spirits, chanting scriptures, and training the mind/heart to choose joys that accumulate merit. When we give, we receive blessings from merit beyond imagination. Wishing you a peaceful Vu Lan season, filled with love and wisdom.