When We Love, Even the Water Chestnut Looks Round: A Lesson on Emotion and Wisdom

Introduction: One Folk Verse, Two Layers of Depth

Have you ever heard the verse: "When we love, even the water chestnut looks round; when we hate, even the round gourd looks crooked"? Our ancestors distilled a profound psychological truth: emotion governs all human judgment. When we love someone, we see them as beautiful and good—even their flaws become charming. When we dislike someone, even their virtues seem suspect. In the Buddha's teachings (Dharma), this is called "emotion clouding wisdom"—when feelings run high, wisdom becomes obscured. Today's article will take you deeper into this lesson, showing that the Dharma is not something distant, but precisely the practical matters of everyday life.

The Dharma Is Practical and Present

Thay Thich Chan Quang emphasizes: the Buddha defined the Dharma as "practical and present, timeless, something to be seen here and now." This means the teachings are not lofty, remote abstractions, but must be connected to real life. Thay shares: "Even a folk verse from our grandparents can be the Dharma, if it helps us see the truth clearly." This reminds us: when studying the Buddha's teachings, we should always ask ourselves—can this be applied to my own life? If not, it may have lost its practicality over time.

"The Dharma is what is practical and present. When we hear a teaching explained or study it in books, if it connects to our real life, then it is truly an element of the true Dharma."

The Factors That Skew Our View of the World

Thay points out many factors that lead our judgments astray: physical beauty, personal attachments, degrees and credentials, wealth, private grudges, emotional impressions, and karma and conditions (dependent origination) from the past. For example, a beautiful person easily wins our affection, even if their character may not be good; we defend our loved ones even when they are wrong; whatever a rich person says sounds reasonable, while a poor person is ignored even when speaking the truth. All of this stems from personal emotion creeping in. Thay tells a story: "When a rich person invites someone to abandon the Buddhist path, people listen more readily than when a poor person invites them to visit the temple—even though going to the temple is the more wholesome choice."

"A person's blessings from merit steer our judgment of them. If someone has blessings from merit, it still pushes us to evaluate them as good, even when their true nature is not."

The Lesson on Love and Judgment

As Buddhists, we need to learn to see objectively, not letting emotion overwhelm reason. When evaluating a person, we should filter out the factors of bias. Thay advises: "When assessing a person, filter out all of those things and look with accuracy." In particular, do not rush to accept praise or criticism from others, for they too are swayed by love and hate. Use wisdom and compassion to see a person's true nature clearly.

Conclusion: Living with Mindfulness, Loving in the True Sense

The lesson from the verse "When we love, even the water chestnut looks round" not only helps us recognize the pitfalls of emotion, but also encourages us to practice in order to gain clear insight. Let us learn letting go of our biases and look at everyone with the eyes of compassion and wisdom. This is how love does not cloud what is right, and how life becomes more peaceful and joyful. As Thay teaches: "The Dharma is practical and present—apply it immediately to your life to experience its benefits."